Orgasm is overrated.

Great sex ≠ orgasm

It seems many men tend to think that by giving a woman orgasm they fulfill their task in bed or are more manly. When they don’t give woman an orgasm, they feel disappointed or embarrassed. I noticed a general misconception that great sex must end with an orgasm, which couldn’t be further from the truth.

Don't try too hard

Sex is more enjoyable if there are no expectations and no goal. It’s best if you just enjoy what’s happening here and now instead of rushing and trying hard to give each other instant orgasms.

Let me tell you this: if you focus on giving me orgasm, I will not have it for sure.

First of all, I will feel that you’re not doing it for my pleasure or for your pleasure but just for the goal and the satisfaction of achieving it.
Secondly, you will be in rush, we won’t be relaxed, patient and attentive as we should be during sex.
Lastly, I will feel pressure like I have a task to do. It’s not a good mindset.

Don't miss what's really important

It’s really not good to try to reach orgasm so hard. If you focus too much on getting to the final destination, you might forget to enjoy the journey. And after you put so much work into it and don’t manage to reach your goal, you will feel disappointed and frustrated. At the end, you won’t have neither the orgasm, nor enjoyable sex.

Orgasm is nice, but...

Don’t get me wrong. Orgasm is nice. But it’s not a condition to a great sex. It’s not even on top of the list. There are much more important things in sex than orgasm.

I don’t need to have an orgasm to have nice sex. What I need is closeness, affection, intimacy, connection. Some nice touch, kisses, passion and stimulation. Some excitement, some seductive atmosphere.

What I want is a sensual (or wild) experience after which we both feel like we just had a great, fulfilling moment together. A unique interaction between two people, a mix of two temperaments, a jurney of two bodies and fusion of two desires.

How to get there then? By not trying

What can you do to have good sex (and maybe even mutual orgasm)? Just focus on the moment. Try to feel every touch, every kiss, every sensation. Enjoy it with me. If you want to give me pleasure, listen to my suggestions. Take it slow. No rush, no pressure. And if the moment, the chemistry, the mood is right, I will get there (as an addition to a great sex).

Are you looking for a date in Warsaw? Make sure to check out my website:

Sex & Intimacy

Nicole Kaminski

Escort & Masseuse in Warsaw

I’m an independent, professional masseuse based in Warsaw, Poland. On my blog, I write about subjects related to my work: erotic massage, sensuality & intimacy. You can also find here interesting posts for massage clients and helpful tips for gentlemen planning to book an erotic massage in Warsaw.